Hello my NFL gals. I’m feeling thoughtful this week; maybe it was that damn Glee “goodbye to Finn episode”, or maybe the fact that my fantasy team is turning it around, but my world’s got more ups and downs than an Eli Manning-led offense.
To that end, I’ve chosen little tidbits for assorted NFL teams to love, hate or simply ponder as we enter week six in the greatest game ever played!
Arizona Cardinals – Larry Fitzgerald has been finishing his degree at the University of Phoenix, which is commendable, but is he ready to get schooled by the 49ers on Sunday?
Atlanta Falcons – Watching this team fall from grace is painful, but somehow Tony Gonzalez’ dimples make it all feel ok.
Buffalo Bills – Check out the hashtag about a certain Bills’ rookie at #thelegendofkikoalonso for the funniest tweets since #chucknorris.
Cleveland Browns – Since trading their best player, they’re 3-0. Love the grit and wondering if they could be a real player in the weak AFC North.
Dallas Cowboys – Which is more mind boggling – the fact that Tony Romo can score 48 points and still be questioned as a great QB, or that Jerry Jones owns a flip phone?
Denver Broncos – Peyton Manning is playing the position perhaps better than any quarterback EVAH. Remember this historic time, fans.
Detroit Lions – Anyone understand the Megatron/P.Diddy ads? Am I not cool enough?
Green Bay Packers – Who would win the Clay Matthews Fathead ads vs. the Aaron Rogers Discount Double Check ads showdown? “An NFL quarterback isn’t a job” FTW.
Houston Texans – So, angry fans showed up at QB Matt Schaub’s house after his poor performance this week. Hope they thanked him for breaking every record in franchise history. Idiots.
Indianapolis Colts – As much as I love Andrew Luck, I think calling Stanford’s OC the Andrew Luck Director of Offense is really creepy.
Jacksonville Jaguars – Pass.
Kansas City Chiefs – Going from worst to 5-0, plus some of the greatest BBQ in the country. Life is good in KC!
Minnesota Vikings – Josh Freeman is the new QB in a surprising trade with Tampa Bay. They are trying to strike while the iron is hot…the iron in this case being Adiran Peterson.
New England Patriots – Tom Brady derailed from his touchdown scoring streak. Patriots relying on defense to win games. Finally, all of our dreams are coming true.
New Orleans Saints – Apparently cheaters do prosper, but Drew Brees makes it feel ok.
New York Giants – Eli and his boys can’t get a break. Shockingly, they are still very much a player in the terrible NFC East.
New York Jets – Jetties are revived after Geno Smith’s remarkable comeback last week. Could this train wreck of a team actually be a contender?
Oakland Raiders – Raiders are looking like Terrell Pryor is everything they wanted Jamarcus Russell to be long ago.
Philadelphia Eagles – Chip Kelly’s high flying offense hasn’t proven out but the season is young and I am hoping Matt Barkley gets a shot in the rotating parade of QBs.
San Diego Chargers – They’re like the mafia. They keep pulling you back in…letting you believe they’ll be good, and then blowing massive leads to bring you back to earth.
San Francisco 49ers – Can Kaep continue to progress as a pocket QB, and will Jim Harbaugh ever wear anything on the sidelines besides khakis?
Tampa Bay Buccaneers – This team is getting overtaken by a fungus.
Washington Redskins – Whether or not they change the name, they should really change the owner!
There seems to be a high propensity of “dud” games in the NFL this weekend but here’s a few we’ll watch –
Jacksonville at Denver –
The battle of the worst team in the league vs. the best. Some are saying Denver could score more points than any team, ever. Grab your popcorn and enjoy.
New Orleans at New England –
Which former powerhouse is the real deal? This game will hinge on defense, and if the Patriots can stop Drew Brees, they may have a chance.
Oakland at Kansas City –
Just last season, this game would have been a complete yawner. But the surging Raiders are now looking to hand the 5-0 Chiefs their first loss. Wait…what? Bizarro universe for sure!
I will be heading on the road this week to see my top team play not once, but twice. Life is good when ya got football!