Team’s record getting you down? Take heart, football lovers. So many good teams are 0-2 right now, it’s almost en vogue. It gives you reason for optimism, right?
Well, pump the brakes, sports fans. Chances are that your team will not be making the playoffs. In fact, teams that are 0-2 after the first two games have historically only made the post season 11% of the time.
This year’s slate, however, is chock full of top-rated squads like the Colts, Seahawks, Ravens, Saints and Eagles, along with question mark clubs like the Bears, Lions, Texans, and Giants.
Shockingly, the Jaguars, Browns, Raiders and other perennial bottom feeders are not 0-2, and the Ryan Fitzpatrick-led Jets are 2-0 and looking solid. So…football is football and that’s why we love it. Parity rules the league and 0-2 is no cause for alarm.
Still, I will be bringing my secret weapon to Tennessee this Sunday to cheer for my Colts, in the form of a cute eight year old boy who I guarantee knows more about football than you.
Nothing Says Fall Like…
This week marks the start of Fall, so suck down a Pumpkin Spice Latte and consider these tidbits –
Kam Chancellor, the Seahawks’ safety and defensive leader, ended a two-month holdout and rejoined his team after two losses where he could have been the difference maker. While details are still slim on who caved to who, the whole thing just smacks of highly paid whiny athletes and ridiculous billionaire owners, contracts meaning nothing and loyalty flying out the door. That’s the norm nowadays people, so turn to your friend at the bar on Sunday and say “It’s a damn shame these holdouts seem to work, as I think we’ll see more and more of them.”
Another Cam, this one Newton, continued his Superman antics with a full flip into the end zone. ESPN immediately rounded up a gaggle of famous gymnasts to critique. I’m serious. Can anyone in the NFL just have a moment anymore?
DeMarco Murray is pissed. Why? Because last year’s rushing leader, and the Eagles offense, is getting nowhere fast so far this year, to the dismay of fantasy owners everywhere. And his death look at QB Sam Bradford is the same one I give to my husband when he leaves his hockey gear sitting in the washer and I open it. I literally walk back into the house just to give him “the look”. And damn if DeMarco don’t got it down.
If you missed the Broncos v. Chiefs game last Thursday, you missed one of the best games of the year already. It was a defensive battle that came down to Denver scoring twice in 29 seconds to take the win. It was slated to go to overtime until top RB Jamaal Charles fumbled on the last possession, and Denver promptly picked it up and scored. Oh, and also, haters, Peyton with a shaky start is still better than most quarterbacks in the league so would you just please….
Fantasy Football Spectacular Tip
Not that I’m one to give great advice – I went from first to worst this week – but I still say it’s not time to panic yet. Stick with Luck, he’ll bounce back this week after facing two of the toughest defenses in the NFL. DeMarco Murray’s hamstring is fine and Mike Evans should be fully recovered this week. But don’t be like me, second guess yourself last minute and bench, say, Larry Fitzgerald, who then proceeds to have his best fantasy game EVER. Just hypothetical, of course. The moral of the story is, trust your instincts and enough with the last minute jimmying of the lineup.
And When Football’s Not On – Your Bachelor Gap Filler
Missing your trash TV? Need something to fill the rare nights of week without football? First of all, I suggest the NFL Network Replays. You can watch the games with no pesky commercials, or even annoying 3 and outs. Also consider WAGS, the new show on E! featuring “wives and girlfriends” of professional athletes. The conquests of players like Larry English and Shaun Phillips star in this train wreck of boobs and lips which desperately need the help of New England’s “Deflator”. Sasha Gates, wife of Charger Tight End Antonio Gates, is the most confusing cast member to me. Well known in the community for her philanthropic efforts, Ms. Gates now joins the “Housewives” type group celebrating greed and bad behavior. I can’t imagine her motivation to do this show…maybe Antonio’s four-game suspension left the bank account a little light?
In the meantime, I’ve got a plane to catch, to help my team grapple their way back to 1-2. The comeback starts now.